loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
