we're chasing vodka with high fives
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
