I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
