the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
me + whiskey = a bad person
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
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