I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
We are two peas in an std pod
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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