Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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