just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
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