An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
birth control should be required to get into college
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
