i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
