Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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