we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
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