My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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