WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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