Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
