I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize
