So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Randomize
