Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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