I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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