yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
