you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
