but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Drunk walkin through police station. America
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
