okay pat passed out under dana's car
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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