Nicole vs. Life
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Randomize