The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize