You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize