doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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