We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
