Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
