you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
