the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Randomize
