The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
