please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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