wanna go halves on a baby?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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