If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
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When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
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