You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize