ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
