The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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