What did we do last night that was yellow?
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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