she kept yelling 'call me bella'
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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