i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
my shit smells like andre
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
My dad just said "fuck circus"
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Randomize
