She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I need moral support for this bender
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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