just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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