i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize