Texts From Last Night

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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life

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  (615): arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life http://tfl.nu/ewvo
  Replies (152) Good night (3808) Bad night (891)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.

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  (970): Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it. http://tfl.nu/yvle
  Replies (12) Good night (782) Bad night (3554)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.

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  (703): You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am. http://tfl.nu/rcus
  Replies (11) Good night (3885) Bad night (577)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.

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  (301): We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope. http://tfl.nu/4d9q
  Replies (28) Good night (5432) Bad night (609)
• Favorite

  (712): View more from Iowa

  I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.

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  (712): I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled. http://tfl.nu/klod
  Replies (37) Good night (5327) Bad night (746)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."

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  (512): You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you." http://tfl.nu/7ipp
  Replies (9) Good night (4296) Bad night (1806)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?

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  (206): How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it? http://tfl.nu/31c7
  Replies (23) Good night (3004) Bad night (1814)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"

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  (845): dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED" http://tfl.nu/7ras
  Replies (4) Good night (1139) Bad night (2671)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.

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  (206): Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year. http://tfl.nu/cw7s
  Replies (2) Good night (3781) Bad night (932)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.

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  (305): Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault. http://tfl.nu/pad6
  Replies (3) Good night (583) Bad night (1026)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...

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  (972): Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch... http://tfl.nu/v5jz
  Replies (11) Good night (998) Bad night (838)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?

  (416): View more from Toronto

  I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way

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  (416): Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again? (416): I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way http://tfl.nu/h01t
  Replies (4) Good night (725) Bad night (1099)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person

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  (817): My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person http://tfl.nu/r4rm
  Replies (3) Good night (1373) Bad night (476)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor

  (206): View more from Washington

  Haha oh no

  (425): View more from Washington

  The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends

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  (425): I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor (206): Haha oh no (425): The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends http://tfl.nu/igx9
  Replies (1) Good night (695) Bad night (336)
• Favorite

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.

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  (320): I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset. http://tfl.nu/g6h4
  Replies (1) Good night (791) Bad night (315)

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