so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Randomize
