Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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