You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
im holly from the hills drunk
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
