the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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