Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Randomize
