Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
The beer is more important than you right now.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
