Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
